I dumped him for the BBD - One Hot Chick to another.
From Kira Reed’s book SCORE How To Win The Girl Of Your Dreams.
You asked her out, she said yes, and you had a great first date. Congratulations! Woo Hoo! Hooray for you!
Enjoy the moment.
OK, moment’s over. Sorry to break this to you, but just because you had a nice meal and you feel there’s some chemistry, you haven’t won her over just yet. The fact is a hot woman is always looking for The BBD: The Bigger Better Deal. Until you’re in a committed relationship— some might say until you put a ring on her finger—you have to compete with every other Joe Schmo that gets up the guts to ask her out. For a Hot Chick to stay with you, decline all other invitations from her many gentleman callers, and commit to being intimate with you, it is essential that you convince her that you are the Biggest Best Deal. I’m going to guide you through the crucial courting dates and tell you how to become The BBD. If date number two is indeed on the horizon, this is what you need to do if you want to ride off into the sunset with your lady and live happily ever after... or at least take one step closer to getting her panties off.
Second Date Suggestions
The perfect second date is someplace that you discovered she likes from date number one. It should not just be another dinner but dinner plus something special, like an event. Let’s say in talking about music that she mentioned she loves jazz. Great. Plan a date to a restaurant with a live jazz band and dancing or an outdoor jazz concert in the park where you can bring an intimate picnic, or follow a meal with a trip to a sultry jazz bar. Perhaps you talked about how she can’t wait to see the Picasso exhibition that just came to town. Find out when she is free and get tickets to the exhibit and pair the outing with a restaurant she mentioned she loves or always wanted to try.
The goal here is to give your Dream Girl everything her heart desires.
This can also be your chance to show another side of you. After a romantic, candlelit, gourmet Italian first-date dinner, if you think she’s down for it from what you learned about her, go more casual. Let’s say she said she’s a baseball fan. Fun! Get two great seats to a game and suggest hot dogs and beer at the venue in lieu of a sit-down dinner. Perhaps you know that she thinks bowling is totally campy fun and she hasn’t been in years. Make a reservation at an upscale alley like Lucky Strike Lanes for a game of ten-pin and bar food. If she said she likes hiking and you know some trails, fill up a backpack with gourmet snacks, a camera, a map, and some chilled drinks and head for the hills. Drawing outside of the typical dinner date lines shows her that you are daring and full of surprises. By choosing things that you know she’ll enjoy, you keep her thinking:
“Wow, this guy is really cool. There are a lot of sides to him I like. And, we have so many things in common.”
If she is more the opera, champagne, and caviar type, and your wallet agrees with that kind of lifestyle, the second date is your time to show off. Take her to your favorite fine dining restaurant. Order La Grande Dame and the master chef’s famous soufflé. If you have tickets to theatre, ballet, or orchestra, break them out and take her on a night of sophisticated pleasures. Prove to her that if she is looking for a life of luxury, she need not look any further than you.
Whatever way you want to go, make sure it is something she will love to do and is available to do it by running it past her first and following the planning and confirming procedure from “Be a Great Date.” Also, be sure anything you plan is not throwing her into the midst of your close friends, family, or business associates. It is too early for that. This relationship is new and fragile. You need to treat it like the delicate creature it is.
Give Her a Gift
After you give her a welcome kiss, either on her doorstep or your meeting place of choice, the way to a woman’s heart is through the gifts you give her. Though diamonds are a girl’s best friend, she isn’t expecting them on the second date. But know Hot Chicks are used to billionaire businessmen wowing them with glittering trinkets, designer handbags, and luxury label clothing. They have grown accustomed to prolific artists wooing them with songs they wrote about their beauty and paintings they’ve inspired. You get the picture.
Hot women are spoiled.
Flowers and chocolates, though nice, are not going to bowl us over with their unoriginality. What will win our gratitude, respect, and, therefore, access to our hearts and bodies, are thoughtful gifts based on you knowing what we like. You will need to have paid attention during date number one to surprise her with a present on date number two. Get the future love of your life something that you discovered she would want from getting to know her on your initial outing.
She talked about how much she liked some new Kings of Leon song that played on the radio. When you said you’ve loved them for years then asked her if she knew the rest of their albums, she said no that she didn’t. Well... duh. Gomake her a mixed CD of their songs from the past ten years or get her an iTunes gift card and make a recommendation list so she can go download their music.
Remember she was goosepimply cold on your first date? You offered her your jacket when you were waiting for the valet because she was shivering. Bring her a Pashmina shawl in a neutral black, beige, or grey so she “will always be warm when she’s with you.”
Did you two talk about an author, poet, or artist you both love, but she hasn’t gotten his or her latest book yet? Go! Get it for her. Come on man, that’s your cue.
You don’t have to overdo it. You don’t have to spend a fortune. You don’t want to seem like you’re trying to buy her. However, you do want to show her you’re paying attention, you’re thinking about her, and she’s so special you’d go out of your way to get her something unique to her.
Regardless of what you get for her, you must give gifts to your lady out of the goodness of your heart to make her happy. Remember, anything you give her is hers, not yours to take back if things don’t work out or she breaks up with you down the road. If you have ever given a woman a valuable item and then asked for it back, it shows you didn’t give it in a genuinely loving way. It was really just about you wanting to buy her or make yourself look good. By asking for the gift back, you end up with the opposite effect: looking like a complete asshole. Don’t be stupidlike Stu in The Hangover, who gives the Vegas stripper he just met his grandmother’s Holocaust ring.
Don’t give it away if you can’t part with it for good.
Manners Are Forever
Don’t forget the basic rule of manners of the first date or on the second, third, or tenth date. Open the car door, say please and thank-you, and be nice to service people. Ask her opinion about the menu or what she would like to do. Don’t decide for her. Most importantly: Stay off the phone. The moment you get on your phone for more than emergencies is the moment she feels you take her for granted. She can then easily choose to be with someone else who will pay full attention to her for at least the length of a dinner. If you need to make a call, excuse yourself, go to the restroom, and do it quickly.
Handy Manly Stuff is Hot
Does your new Dream Girl need a couch moved, a tree trimmed, a sink unclogged, a car fixed, a stereo hooked up, or a computer repaired? Great! Now is your time to show her you are The Man. Now, don’t get down on your hands and knees and expose your plumber crack unless you actually know what you are doing under that sink. Making it worse is a total turn-off. However, if you doknow what you’re doing—bonus points! You may think your tech savvy is a little geeky until it comes in handy with the babes. A girl who can’t figure out how to download the latest version of Microsoft Office will be all hot and bothered when you can. Even if you don’t have the brains to hook up her Blu-ray to her surround sound or the brawn to do any heavy lifting, you can still be her manly man by calling an audio specialist or moving service you’ve used and know you can trust to help your lovely lady out of her jam. It tells her you are connected, you can help, and she is lucky to have you.
You to Her Rescue
Now you probably don’t have on your Dream Girl list of qualities that you want a woman who is “stalked by her ex”, in a “legal dispute” or “is in need of a good dentist to pull an inflamed wisdom tooth.” Though these are not good problems to have, they are great opportunities to come to her rescue. Can you help her by confronting a harassing boyfriend to let him know his old flame is newly spoken for? Do you have a good lawyer you can go to for advice and save her some hefty legal fees? Do you have a great pain-free dentist who you can take her to? Be her knight in shining armor by helping her during a time of crisis. Don’t get in the middle of anything too messy or dangerous or that you can get sucked into for too much cash. But if you can offer advice, call on a connection or be there to hold her hand through something traumatic; she will foreverbe grateful to you helping her in a time of crisis and not holding it against her.
Stand Up for Her
I love the scene in the movie The Fighter where Mark Wahlberg physically assaults a drunk dude who is hitting on the barmaid girl he likes, played by Amy Adams, and tells him never to disrespect her again. She is, in that moment, totally his. I’m not saying you have to get in a bar brawl to win over a girl. However, you do need to “have her back” if you expect her to consider you her man. When walking down the street, walk on the outside to protect her from passing cars. Hold her hand when maneuvering in a crowd, and make way for her to get through. If you leave to check your phone in the bathroom and come back to find some slimy pick-up artist trying to chat up your girl, step right in and tell him in no uncertain terms that she is taken. Hesitation of waiting for him to leave or making her tell him to get lost is not an option. She is your girl—you must make her feel safe.
Seal the Deal with Something Special
One of the best ways you can assure you are the Biggest Best Deal is to bring up something extra special for an upcoming future date. This should be an out-of-the- ordinary event, adventure, or trip that you know she will love and that she can look forward to doing with you in the next month or so. Let’s say on your first date youtalked about your mutual love of the R & B artist Drake. On the second date, you bring her a mixed CD of your favorite Drake: Live in Concert songs. Before the third date, you should find out when he is coming to a city near you and purchase tickets to the concert. When the moment is right, present her with the opportunity. She will be totally excited and say yes to a date with you that may be several weeks or even months in the future. This means she is committed to another several dates with you before then with more chances to grow the relationship and get intimate. This means, she not only likes Drake, she likes you too.
Bottom Line: Convince her that you are the best guy out there for her so she will want to be with you and only you.
Learn more about How To Win The Girl Of Your Dreams with SCORE! Hardcopy and Kindle download now available at Amazon: http://www.ScoreTheBook.com